Are you being served….
We had a rather successful trip to Wilmslow today. In the WAG capital of Cheshire we managed to buy two new suits (for the new job) and have pretty much (hopefully) booked our summer holiday for September – Sicily! We also managed to curtail the time spent in the sunglasses and handbag sections. Result!
And, there was an amusing distraction in Hoopers, a family run department store with a bright and shiny newly refurbished ground floor, but with the upper floors still seemingly modelled on Grace Brothers from Are You Being Served, and very much stuck somewhere in the 1970s.
“Fortunately” we were in the store just as they were beginning their Swimwear and Cruising catwalk show on the first floor. Only in Cheshire!
It was hilarious. Let’s just say that the youthful, leggy, attractive models were not entirely representative of their audience. The catwalk was lined with Cheshire’s well-to-do pearl and twin set, clearly relieved to find somewhere to rest their Gucci and Mulberry with a glass of free fizz, while their husbands looked like startled rabbits as the six foot leggy lovelies strutted past in their bikinis and one-pieces. The men developed a collective, distant, far-away look of fear in their eyes as they contemplated being locked on a cruise ship with their nearest and dearest for a couple of weeks without the distraction of Legionnaire’s disease or norovirus.
The show was made further surreal by the accompanying voice-over which could have been by Mrs Merton reading a script crafted by Smashy and Nicey, in which Mrs M extolled the virtues of the current display of flounce and linen for “cruising with Oscar” (it means something different in Cheshire – I hope), and the “statement you would make at the Captain’s table”. All it lacked was a heated debate….
Stifling a chuckle and feeling a little voyeuristic, we beat a hasty retreat before the drawing of the raffle, in case we won anything, and headed to Pizza Express for a, you guessed it….
I am, however, thinking of returning to Hoopers for the Holly Willoughby road show at end the end of April…… I kid you not.