Maslow Is Feeling Needy
Maslow is currently convalescing back home after an operation to repair a damaged cruciate ligament. He is the Michael Owen of the feline world. Hardly. He injured himself escaping from next-door’s dog, Millie, just over a week ago. Millie doesn’t like cats. Maslow likes some dogs. Maslow tolerates other dogs. But, on one particular evening, Maslow decided to wind Millie up. I suspect he will be keeping his distance from now on.
While Millie was indoor and sat in the neighbour’s window, Maslow would sit in her line of sight giving Millie the cat-equivalent of “the bird”, while she barked her tiny brains out. When Millie was brought into the garden and tied to a stake (not in the Joan of Arc manner), Maslow proceeded to walk up and down nonchalantly, wiggling his bum, while Millie continued to bark her brains out. Until Millie pulled the stake out of the ground and proceeded to chase Maslow.
Now Maslow is not what you might call a natural athlete. Indeed he is somewhat overweight and has been on a closely monitored diet for a couple of years now (bad parents!). He takes very little exercise and, apart from the usual morning moment of madness (normally immediately after making use of his litter tray for a number two) in which he looks up at an imaginary monster in the corner of the room and runs around like a mad thing for thirty seconds before collapsing, exhausted, in a heap, Maslow is rarely seen running.
But, when Mollie broke free that night, Maslow ran. It was like a scene from a Tom and Jerry cartoon (except with a dog and a cat). Maslow ran under the neighbour’s car and then jumped over a low wall and around the front and side of our house before crashing through his cat flap. At all times, Millie was just millimetres away from Maslow’s tail and snapping with her teeth. Fortunately, Millie could not get through the cat flap. Maslow hid behind the sofa growling and panting for a couple of hours. When he eventually emerged he was clearly in pain and limping. He had hurt his hind right leg. And, he had injured his pride.
A trip to the vets followed. This was to be the first of several. Maslow did not go willingly. He was given a general anaesthetic and had his leg x-rayed and was checked all over to make sure that he had not been bitten or had any other injuries. He was sent home with orders to rest and we were given pain killers and anti-inflammatories to administer. Maslow then spent a few days at home very suspicious of his parents who had imprisoned him on the ground floor and ignoring all attempts at stopping him from jumping on and off furniture and window ledges on his poorly leg.
We then returned to the vets. Maslow did not go willingly. The vet concluded that the injury would not heal naturally and decided that she would need to operate after the weekend. So, Maslow spent the weekend locked indoors and becoming even more suspicious of his parents who now seemed to be starving him as well as imprisoning him (he could not eat for twelve hours before the operation) until we returned him to the vets yesterday for his operation. He did not go willingly.
Thankfully the operation went well. At least he survived yet another general anaesthetic! He has a weak chest and it is always a worry when he has to be put under. But, he had to stay in overnight on a drip for pain relief. The house seemed very quiet and empty without him. C consoled herself by preparing a room for his return. For his convalescence. For the regime of strict rest and recuperation that the vet has stressed he must have. I consoled myself with a glass of red wine on a non-drinking night. C joined me and also had a sneaky cigarette on a non-smoking night.
And so, the study has been converted into a safe haven cum animal hospital for the wounded soldier. All chairs and other items of furniture which he may be tempted to jump up onto have been removed. His litter tray and his Alessi food and water bowl – well this is Cheshire, darlings – have been relocated but are sufficiently distant so that he does not get upset. And, his sleeping igloo and favourite cushion have been installed and C is preparing to spend quality time with him sat on the floor reading books and playing with her iPad while he rebuilds his strength.
And that is where they both are now. Unfortunately I am currently away on business. Otherwise, Maslow would be taking great pleasure in ignoring me. For it was always me that had the job of catching Maslow and shoving him into his basket to take him in the three trips to the vets. And, he has never ever gone willingly.
But of course, with Maslow things rarely go smoothly. He has apparently been good as gold at the vets – no doubt part of a cunning escape plan – but upon returning home Maslow has attempted to flee his safe haven and resorted to trying to chew through his stitches. You can imagine that this has proved a little stressful for C who is bearing the burden solo in my absence, and prompted a return visit to the vets to acquire a hood to prevent him from self-harming. We have one thoroughly pissed off feline.
Get well soon furball baby!