Man Flu

December 27, 2010 at 11:03 am 1 comment


I have just slept for almost eleven hours straight, having already dozed my way through most of the previous day. Well, when I say slept, I was wallowing in a pool of my own sweat and hallucinating my way through drug induced dreams. It is powerful stuff that Beechams Max Flu Plus – you can’t get more powerful than a Max Flu Plus.

I have man flu. Proper man flu. For just the second time in my adult life I have taken to my bed through illness – and last time it was the swine flu that got me.

Actually, I was ordered to my bed by my good lady wife and my mother-in-law yesterday morning. That is an order that has to be obeyed even on Boxing Day. Apparently, I had not been at my best as congenial host on Christmas Day and they did not think me up to the drive to my own parents.

To be fair, I was not feeling great. I had not been feeling great since Wednesday but I had struggled on manfully. I coped with the burst pipe and the flood in the hallway (well, at least I supervised the kindly neighbor who came to my rescue). I cleared snow and gritted the drive. I struggled to Waitrose to acquire sprouts and a goose. I chopped logs for the fire and I produced sprouts in Riesling with lardons, cauliflower cheese, prune and Armagnac stuffing, sumptuous gravy and perfect crispy roast potatoes. Thank you Delia.

But I could not clear the brick that had formed in my forehead or the racking cough, the fever, or the streaming nose. And so, yesterday morning I made my apologies to my mom and sister who I would not be celebrating Boxing Day with and took to my bed. C did her very best Florence Nightingale and kept me topped up with tea, water, pills and the power cable for my iPhone. I dosed. I sweated. I looked forward to the occasional visit from the cat. And from C. I finished my book – City of Thieves by David Benioff (much recommended). I got very, very bored.

By 7pm I was allowed downstairs for dinner – reheated Christmas dinner – and to watch Top Gear in the Holyland, which was hilarious. But, I was not allowed wine or a rummage amongst the liquors and by 9.30 pm I was back in my bed for my mammoth sleep. And here I remain. C has gone to Waitrose  The cat has curled up next to me on the bed as I doze and hallucinate in a drug crazed haze in which, would you believe it, I am imagining we are thrashing the Aussies in the Ashes. It is not quite the cosy, cuddled up, post Christmas special us time C and I had imagined.

I hope I get better soon 


Entry filed under: middleman. Tags: , .

Localism Crewe Station

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Comment in brief « The YamYam Walsall  |  December 28, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    […] comment on the front page Comment in brief 27 Dec 10 Middle Man Man Flu Comment in brief 24 Dec 10 The Sturdy Soapbox 8.3 million presents already delivered Cllr Mike […]



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